Jim And Bones ficlets
by Neferit
Summary: As the title suggest - Jim/Bones goodness in here, written for prompts at Jim and Bones LJ ommunity. Beware of slash, suggestive imagery, silly humour and crappy writings. Ratings change each chapter.
1. Way To Start Day M

**A/N:** Written for **jim_and_bones **daily pic. The community is F-locked, and the pictures were NSFW, so beware.

Also, this is my first try at Bonesy/Jimmy slashy goodness (uhm, first try at slash AT ALL), so beware of epic fails.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing - but _man_, the pictures were _steamy_!

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><p><strong>Way To Start Day<strong>

Bones tended to surprise Jim. Whenever he thought _'this is something what Bones would_ so _not do'_, Bones just went and did it.

Which was why now they were standing in front of the huge windows and glass doors of their house, clad only in tight briefs and making out like horny teenagers. In the morning no less. Morning sex had always been good - but since Bones usually wasn't so demonstrative, especially if there had been a chance someone might see them (which was something he definitely tended to make up to once they were alone). But right now, Bones' mouth was conquering his, his hand sliding down his body right into his briefs, making him gasp as Bones fingers closed around him, feelings intensified by the fact they had been unable to do nearly anything last few weeks before this shoreleave.

Speaking about teenagers... Jim really hoped they do something more before he comes in his pants like one.

He was so enveloped in the sensations that he completely missed Bones walking him back to the kitchen that he 'woke up' only when his butt hit the kitchen table.

"Bones?" he asked, breaking the kiss to look at Bones. The other man just gave him a smile, the slow and sensual one, melting his bones as easy as he would melt butter. He leaned towards him, and whispered in that Southern drawl of his: "Just sit on the floor, darlin', and I'll make it worth your while."

Never let it be said that Jim didn't follow instructions well (at least the ones said like this). He was down quicker than he would physically possible before, Bones following right behind, his hands sliding around Jim's torso, sending shivers down his spine, his mouth following the trace of his hands.

And then he took Jim's erection in his mouth and world exploded.

It was over almost immediately, much to Jim's embarrassment. But before he could say anything, Bones was kissing him again, hard and demanding while his hand was working on _hardening_him again.

"Good," he growled. "Now we can finally start to enjoy the day."

Well, there definitely were better places than the kitchen floor - but you have to start the day somewhere, no?

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><p><strong>AN:** And this is also where this ficlet ends, hee. But since I doubt I will leave the community, I suppose saying "prepare for more!" is in order...


	2. I'll Be There For You T

**A/N:** Written for **jim_and_bones **daily pic for March 26 Semi-weekly man on man feature. The community is F-locked, so beware. The pictures themselves had been SFW, tho. Aww... *sighs dreamily*

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, especially not those amazing pictres with hugs in them. But if you feel inclined, I always could use some hugs!*nudge nudge*

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><p><strong>I'll Be There For You<br>**

It was one of these crazy days when one does not know where to jump first to manage the loads of work they got on their plate. People rush all around, some of them poking others with their elbows in their rush.

Shortly, it was quite normal day in San Francisco.

Leonard at least though so, until he got to the quarters he and Jim shared. Somehow, them two misfits seemed to fit together well enough that the quartermaster let them room together, even if they studied completely different tracks. Well, and Jim also _may_ have hacked the system as soon as he got his log in codes to the Starfleet Academy Information System. In the months, well, _years_of their stay at Academy he grew quite fond of Jim; the guy never ceased to surprise him, be it his idiotic shenanigans or deep thought some of their fellow student didn't think Jim was capable of.

Still, the sight that greeted him in their room was something what took him by surprise. Jim was singing together with music, _really loud music_, playing the air guitar and wiggling in the rhytm of the string strokes. The song was "I'll Be There For You" by The Rembrandts, group from sometime in 20th century (which was, by some reason, Jim's favourite music period, with all it's variety of styles).

_So no one told you life was gonna be this way  
>Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A<br>It's like you're always stuck in second gear  
>And it hasn't been your day, your week, your month... not even your year - BUT<em>

Yup, kid, no one told neither me, nor you, that life can get so fucked up, he thought almost fondly. And, hm, it was better not to really think about the rest. Because it was sadly true.

_I'll be there for you when the rain starts to pour_

Which was strangely true - that rain which broke on their third day at Academy had been entirely unexpected - as well as heavy and seemingly endless. And Jim still somehow managed to conjure an absolutely enormous umbrella for them to hide under, as they run towards their building.

_I'll be there for you as I've been there before_

Yup, that was part for him obviously. Jim's birthday had been rather depressing time - everybody asking him idiotic questions about George Kirk, and Winona Kirk, and Kelvin and devil cares what else; no one noticing the increasing tenseness of Jim's muscles. He almost dragged Jim to their room, where both of them could finally breathe in relief to be away of the too curious stares.

It was strange to see him sit on the bed, his chin resting on his knees, and he wrapped his arms around his legs. In that moment he looked almost fragile. Leonard just sat next to him, wrapping his arm around the younger man.

"You know, Bones," said Jim quietly, "we used to celebrate my birthday. Mom did all she could to celebrate the life which started at the day of death, as the news liked to call it, and it wasn't until much later when everyone started to say "how is it to loose your father" instead of "happy birthday".

Leonard was silent for a moment. Then, letting his head fall on Jim's shoulder, he said quietly: "Happy birthday, Jim."

And Jim just turned his head around slightly, his mouth curling into small smile.

_I'll be there for you - 'cuz you're there for me, too_

"I may throw up on you." Really. His stomach took residence somewhere way too high from its usual place and its content was threatening to decide to look around any moment, when he heard a quiet chuckle. Daring himself to look around he saw a rather battered looking guy, who was giving him an amused half-smile.

"I hear these shuttles are pretty safe," he said.

"Don't pander me, kid! Space is disease and danger wrapped in darkness and silence!" be blurted, his eyes closing as the shuttle took off.

"Got a bad news for you then, man - Starfleet happens to operate in space," sounded from the guy beside him, his voice quiet.

He opened his eyes again. "Yeah," he said, sighing deeply. "But my ex-wife got the whole planet in divorce, leaving me just my bones. All I can do now is go into the black."

The guy smiled from some reason. "Jim Kirk," he introduced himself, holding his hand out. "Leonard McCoy," he replied, shaking the offered hand. "Care to tell me what kind of idiot took look at that face?"

"Oh, that will be a long tale..."

"... and then I was standing out here, and completely overlooking the lowered ceiling."

The shuttle shuddered. "What the hell was that?" Leonard asked, panicking and preparing for terrible death. Jim gave him winning smirk. "That, Bones, was the shuttle landing on good ol' ground."

Oh. It was already _that_much later? Where did the time run? And who the hell was Bones?

_You're still in bed at ten  
>And work began at eight<br>You've burned your breakfast  
>So far... things are goin' great<br>Your mother warned you  
>there'd be days like these<br>Oh but she didn't tell you  
>when the world has brought<br>You down to your knees that  
>I'll be there for you...<em>

Great, great, big fucking great. First, he overslept so terribly that in the end he actually faked being ill and called himself sick. But _of course_it didn't stop at that. Oh no.

He actually got real sick, and while he was in the restroom, trying not to puke his guts out completely, the toast he was making for himself got burnt to the crisp, leaving the room full of smelly black smoke what took ages to get out even with all windows open. They run out of coffee - there was only so little left in the jar that it would be enough for only very weak brew. And add to that, his head started pounding, so he shut the windows, drew the curtains and hid himself in darkness, as he laid on his bed.

Damit, why did he even get out of the bed today?

Some hours later he was awoken again, this time by happy laughter and sounds of something being dropped on the desk. "Hey there, Bones!" sounded Jim's voice. "Let some light in - didn't your momma tell you that where sun does not shine, doctor must go?"

When that didn't get the reaction he expected, Jim moved to sit next to Leonard on his bed. "Bones? What's up?"

Normally, Leonard would just snap about Jim minding his own business and leaving him be - but as misearble as he was, he just blurted it all out - oversleeping, sickness, carbonized toast, headache...

But it wouldn't be Jim not to change the whole situation; he got him cup of absolutely amazing tea, told him what happened during the day and while Leonard had been falling asleep, he actually hummed some melody - soft, calming and tasting of sadness.

Well, let's say that the next day had been very much better - even if Leonard woke up late, there had been of still steaming coffee and a paper bag with "Bones" written on it with.

And he smiled.

_No one could ever know me  
>No one could ever see me<br>Seems you're the only one who knows  
>What it's like to be me<em>

Being one of the two late recruits in sea of first-years, who are several years younger then you sucks. Especially if you happen to be rather haggard looking doctor with serious case of aviophobia or a troublemaker who got into a fight only hours before he appeared on the shuttle. And then, people just saw one grumbly doctor who usually looked like he would bite someone's head off at the slightest provocation and immature flirt, who would flirt with everything that moved.

Almost no one had seen two geniuses they were, each in their own field. One that looked like his face grew into permanent scowl - but who kept stealing looks at pictures of his little girl. And the other, who would flirt with everything that moved (and according to some, even on what didn't move) - but who could be the most polite person you ever met in a blick, saving damsels in distress and kittens from trees.

But they knew this side of each other, and nothing else really mattered.

_Someone to face the day with  
>Make it through all the rest with<br>Someone I'll always laugh with  
>Even at my worst I'm best with you, yeah<em>

Someone was at his door. He just rolled on his side. 'Damit it all, didn't I do enough already on this shitty day...'

"Bones?"

He immediately sat on bed, blinking the sleep away from his eyes. "Jim? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

Jim looked distinctly uneasy. "Yeah, about that... you _do_remember I was not supposed to be here, right?"

"Oh," was all he could say at the first moment. Jim looked as bad as he himself felt - no way he was letting him to wait for some quarters to free, so he could take at least a nap, when he clearly needed as much rest as he could get. So he just raised one side of his covers, growled 'get in' and let his lips form a small smile as he watched the way Jim's eyes shone in the dimmed lights, as he stumbled to the bed, crawling under covers, only to curl himself around Leonard, his arms sneaking around the older man, falling asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow.

And it was just so funny that Leonard had to laugh quietly. James T. Kirk, the cuddle monster. Who would have thought that?

_I'll be there for you  
>I'll be there for you<br>I'll be here for you..._

"'cuz you're there for me, too," said Leonard, turning the radio off to finish the lyrics. Jim stiffened at first but quickly turned around, blushing slightly at being caught.

But then Jim started singing song from one of the ancient roleplaying games he was so fond of (something about scientists - damit, he's a doctor not a singer), making Bones slap a hand to his face and groan. He was doomed - but if nothing else, he was doomed with someone who had his back.

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><p><strong>AN:** Credit for the song _I'll Be There For You_ - amazing song The Rembrandts, and the song mentioned as "from one of the ancient roleplaying games" is from Mass Effect 2. Look for "Mordin Singing" video at youtube. I personally think Mordin rocks people's sock, because his "I am the very model of a scientist Salarian..." is DAT awesome.


	3. Lurkers Will Lurk! K

**A/N:** Short piece written for de-lurking announcement on 1st April at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal. So, uhm, enjoy the crack? :D

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong><span>Lurkers Will Lurk<span>**

"Seriously, Bones, how can you be member of so many awesome communities all around the extranet and not participate in any of them?" asked Jim incrediously, when he saw the list of communities Bones signed being alerted to.

Just from what he saw, there had been about twenty of these - some about movies, some series, even games. He also had a bunch of icons to fit each of these fandoms - but from the activity stats Jim could see from his place behind Bones, looking over his shoulder... Well, there had been none.

"Damit, Jim," grumbled Bones. "I just like to keep an eye about what the trends in fandoms are, so for the time being, I'm quite content with being a lurker there. You know, real life comes first to all of us fanboy geeks."

"But Bones!" exclaimed Jim exasperadly. "You _can't_ be just a lurker! You need to at least comment, if you do not participate in word wars, comment fics or challenges! Feedback must flow, just like the spice!"

Facepalming, Bones turned his attention back to the screen. Sighing, he signed in and looked at the newest entry by community mods. "Lurkers Week" sat right on top of his friends page. Seemed like a good place to start his semi-lurking period (because if he didn't, Jim would never leave him alone, and he had only one set of nerves after all).

Opening the journal, he opened comment posting field and started typing: "Hello, I'm Leo and I used to be a full-time lurker..."


	4. Now We All Be Friends! T

**A/N:** Short piece written for de-lurking week at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal. So, uhm, enjoy the crack? :D This piece happened when I was typing away my friending-meme comment. So - read as a sequel to "Lurkers Will Lurk!" which is chapter 3 in my Jim and Bones ficlets.

**A/N add:** I would like to thank my two lovely anonymous reviewers :) Thank you, my loverlies, I hope you will continue to enjoy this insanity of mine! Also, big thank you to those who favorited or alerted this piece - makes me feel all loooooved.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Now We All Be Friends!<strong>

Bones was scowling at the poor screen in front of him. Ever since Jim nagged him enough to at least occasionally delurk while reading throw the communities he subscribed to, he also tended to nag him to join all these delurking activities. His coming out of the closet with "Hello, I'm Leonard and I used to be a full-time lurker" was not enough. Now, he was supposed to fill some _friending meme_.

Huh.

The questions were making his head hurt - due to all the headdesking he was doing while typing away his answers.

**LJ Name**:

He thought for a moment. He had 'normal' name at his LJ - but recently decided to change it into something a bit less obvious. And, of course, he left the choice to Jim, so this is what came from it. Sighing, he typed the first answer. _LeonardoDeBones_.

**What you like to be called:**

In all what is holy, do not let any of these people call him Bones, damit. _Leonard or Leo would be nice_.

**Time zone:**

_Bloody hells, I'm not a clock, whatever time it is, who cares about timezones anyway_.

**Age:**

_Old enough to know better than to post my age here_. Yes, that will show them, he thought vengefully.

**This fandom status (newbie, veteran etc.)**:

_Not enough time to do anything post read and maybe comment_, he typed, suddenly feeling a bit down. Many times during his time at the Academy or on the _Enterprise_ he thought about picking his PADD and typing some idea into a full-time story - but trust it to this supposedly genius crew to screw his free time into prolonged shift at sickbay. Hmpf!

**Other fandoms:**

_About activity, see the previous answer. Then I'm fan of..._ Huh, the list was even longer than the list of communities he was member of. Strange.

**Fandom thing you're most excited about in the next 3 months:**

_Always up to reading some good stuff. Although, if I had the time to watch some of the movies, I wouldn't be angry_. Yes, he thought, that's true. And whenever they had a movie night, Jim always brought some good drinks and some of the absolutely unhealthy - but damn tasty - food. Yes, that would be something to be excited about - but should someone call him on it, he would deny it to his very last breath!

**Favourite book: **

Now that was question he really enjoyed answering. _The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and the rest of works by Mark Twain_. That was a good start. Now... _Uncle Tom's Cabin_. Hm... _The Poems of Emily Dickinson._ Yeah - poems about death and immortality were the only thing which kept him sane once. _How I Won The War_. What? He still enjoyed good parody when he could get his hands on one. _Wuthering Heights_. Yes. The drama and feelings showed in this... _Jane Eyre_. Well, why the hell not? He likes his books about women who do not become damsels in distress when in trouble, damit. Also, as he glared at the screen, that would probably also be quite enough for now.

**Favourite movie**:

_Gunfight at the O.K. Corral_. _The Good, The Bad and The Ugly_. _Vinnetou_. _The Magnificent Seven_. Stop staring at me like that, he dared the blinking cursor on the screen. I mean it, damit. Why shouldn't anyone from the South like westerns? He liked good comedies, too! _Texas Across the River_. Alright, so this one had been western parody. So what. _Oscar (the one with Stallone)_.

**Favorite music:**

_How the hell should I know? As long as it doesn't make my ears bleed, I like it, _he typed gruffly. Well, Jim sometimes liked to switch the sound into ear-splitting loudness - but usually he knew some way how to make it up to him. Not that anyone would need to know that, of course

**Dream vacation:**

_The one where no one manages to injure themselves in dome idiotic way._ Damn yeah, damit. Undisturbed shore leaves were few and way too far between.

**Way you'd spend 1 million credits:**

_Paid a better lawyer, damit._ 'nuff said.

**Fictional character you'd like to have dinner with:**

_Anyone who wouldn't throw up at me afterwards._ As a doctor he was quite used to being covered in various body fluids - but why to be covered in vomit when it's not necessary? _Also, Eliza Doolittle from My Fair Lady looks to be a good choice_.

**Fictional character you'd like to have quality alone time with:**

_That's for me to know and for you to not snoop about, damit._ Damit, why are people so interested in other people's masturbatory fantasies?

**What's at your journal if we friend you:**

_Rants and maybe occasional update with more rants._ Well, if nothing else, no one can say he's not honest.

**RL or other stuff you'd like to share?**

_I nag, I like coffee, have a kid I'm almost never allowed to see, am bitter as fuck and hate idiots. So unless you want a hypo up your ass, do not try to annoy me. And no, it won't be hypo up your ass in any funny way._ Hm, he was actually starting to like this thing.

**Give us a favourite macro, pic, or video?**

Click - enclose - end picture - ok

End is end, after all, he though, posting the comment and leaning back in his chair, sighing in contentment. And almost jumped out of his skin when a hand landed on his shoulder with hearty chuckle: "I knew you would enjoy that, Bones."

No, doctors definitely do not squeak like a mouse someone stepped on. Definitely not. But even doctors feel all warm and fuzzy, when they are told "let's watch this movie, Bones - and hey, help yourself to some of that popcorn!"


	5. Coffee A Day T

**A/N:** Short piece written for April 2nd semi weekly man-on-man post at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal.  
>Kisses and coffee all around!<p>

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>"Coffee a day..." "Shut up and kiss me right away!"<strong>

There was only one thing better than a full night sleep.

Morning coffee at Macks.

Monika at Macks had special recipe for the coffee, Leonard was damn sure about it. There was no other way how to explain the great smell and even greater taste, contained in the cups on the table before them. It was better than vintage wine. Ambrosia of antique gods couldn't be better.

Or not. There was only one thing better than a full night sleep followed by cup of coffee at Macks. Full night sleep with Bones near, followed by having a cup of coffee with him in the morning. The fresh caffeine softened the good doctor's edges and made him look more like what only he, Joanna and probably Jocelyn knew; all soft and slow, just like his Southern drawl.

Not to mention it had been really gratifying to watch Bones as he enjoyed the miracle called coffee; carefully taking sniff of its aroma, swirling the liquid in the cup, looking into its depths as if there had been mysteries unfolding on the bottom of the cup, raising it to his mouth to take a small sip of the hot beverage, licking the taste from his lips afterwards.

Before he could stop himself, he said, mesmerized by the said lips: "You know, Bones, what they say... coffee a day..."

Bones' grumble interrupted him. "Jim."

"Hm?" he responded absend-mindedly, not really realizing Bones interrupted him.

"Just shut the hell up and kiss me right away, you idiot."

Well, let it not be said that Jim couldn't follow the doctor's orders. At least, once he got the clue.

And the coffee.


	6. Lazy And You Know It T

**A/N:** Short piece written for April 9nd semi weekly man-on-man post at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal. Huggles and cuddles all around!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Lazy And You Know It<br>**

It was one of the slow almost-summer afternoons at Academy. Everyone was busy revising for the last batch of exams - or, if the were lucky, they were just lazying around.

Jim was sometimes really lucky son of a bitch.

Leonard was laying on his bad, trying to read his notes for that damned class about diplomacy (damit, he was a _doctor_, not an ambassador, so if he remembered that he should not shook hands with Vulcans, or not to touch Andorian antennas, of what use was all this diplomacy crap to him), when Jim marched into the room they shared.

"Bonesy!" he called, grinning widely. "Look what I got!"

Oh, Leonard could see it was a book. A very _thick_ one at that. "So what, Jim?" he grumbled, returning his gaze to the computer monitor in front him, reading the very same line for about fifth time without really getting it saved in his memory.

"You still reading the diplomacy stuff, Bones?" Jim asked, clear disbelief in his voice. "Yup," replied Bones, this time a bit morose. "Got the test in two days and can't remember a thing."

"And that's when I come in," exclaimed Jim, smiling widely. He waved the book in front of Leo's face. _'Enchiridion of practical diplomacy'_ read the title, making Leonard groan.

"Jim, really - according to the style the book is named, it's several hundreds years old - you _really _this will help anything?"

"Trust me, Bones," said Jim, suddenly serious. "I wouldn't bring this, if I didn't know it would help you. Like this," he flipped the book open, "there is very nice description of checkmate situation in this book you had in the texbook and didn't know how to solve. let's get started."

Without waiting for any reaction, Jim laid on Bones' bed, placing his head in the curve of Bones' back.

"You do know, Jim," said Bones, turning his head around to see face to face with the younger man, "that you could quite comfortably lay on your own bed over there?"

"Yup," was the answer, "but I'm lazy as hell - and before you say it aloud, I know it!"

Leonard rolled his at Jim's antics and turned back to look into his computer. "You're lazy and and you know it..." he hummed under his breath, and wiggled his ass a bit, making Jim laugh.

It was one of the lazy almost-summer afternoons, and even if he had very little time to prepare for the damn test, he somehow didn't mind it anymore.


	7. Open Ye Window, Fair Childe! T

**A/N:** Short piece written for April 16th semi weekly man-on-man post at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal. Rapuntzel, Rapuntzel, everywhere, open ye window! The community is friend-locked, so unless you are a member, you won't be able to access the awesomeness.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Open Ye Window, Fair Childe!<br>**

Leonard actually facepalmed when he was disturbed from his late afternoon routine with singsong voice saying "Open Ye Window, Fair Childe!"

Trust it to Jim be all almost Rapuntzel, Rapuntzel. Well, at least it ended with Fair Childe. Good thing no one but them had been around.

Jim wasn't standing by any window. The whole house had been not tall enough to have windows in some height which would be good for singing serenadas for Leonard (although that happened already - Jim and dares definitely didn't mix all that well), so Jim at least stood under the level of the small terrace, smiling and scowling Leonard as he made his way towards the railing.

"I hope you do realize that I'm no fair childe, Jim," he started as he leant against the railings, lifting one of his brows just in the patented McCoy glare of doom. It didn't leave any lasting results on Jim, though; the man gave him one of his bright smiles, the one made for making people's knees weak at the sight.

"That's true," he said. "Because you are Bones. _My_ Bones."

And before Leonard could do anything, Jim was standing by the railings, lifting one of Bones' hands to his lips. He was gone in the twinkling of an eye, leaving only Bones standing there for a moment stretching like eternity.

"Huh," he said in the end. "'Open ye window, fair childe' my ass." And for a good measure he added "idiot."

But even as he said it, the faint blush on his cheeks made it impossible to tell whether it meant him or Jim.


	8. Say Nothing T

**A/N:** Short piece written for April 23rd semi weekly man-on-man post at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal. Some manly cuddling, for we all know that Bones is a cuddler!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Say Nothing<br>**

Jim almost jumped out of his skin when a pair of arms sneaked around him, holding him in place while he was cooking and for the first time in days minding his own business instead of being all around the place.

"Bones!" he exclaimed, willing his heartbeat to slow down a little. No need to get a heart-attack, even if it's a doctor who would be its cause. It was actually quite funny to have Bones cuddle like that - because just few hours ago Bones yelled at him to keep his hands to himself dammit.

He allowed himself to relax into Bones' arms, stirring the sauce he was making for dinner. His special version of bolognese sauce - with the secret ingredients passed on to him by grandpa Tiberius - that Bones liked when they were on Earth for a shore leave.

"What brought this up, _Leonard_?" he said, stressing the name playfully.

Bones leant his head on Jim shoulder. "Shh..." he breathed, "no talking - just hugging."

Jim smiled a bit as he was finishing the sauce. Not a word was spoken late into the night, when they fell asleep in each other arms.


	9. Come Hither T

**A/N:** Short piece written for May 01 daily Jim & Bones Daily post at **jim_and_bones** community at LiveJournal. Some 'come hither' Jim and 'no way I'm moving from this place' Bones, aww. *swoons* Add some Shakespeare, sugar high and exam period coming into the mix and you get this.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Come Hither<br>**

"C'mon, Bones, I get it that you suffer from aviophobia - but that's what the therapy should help you with. Now all you need is to pass the flight exam with flying colours and we are off our merry way to summer break," said Jim patiently.

They had been in front of that damned shuttle for about half an hour and Bones stil refused to come even close to that damn thing.

"No," replied Bones, his eyes tightly shut, as he held the seat of Jim's new motorbike tightly. "I'm rather comfortable where I am, thank you very much."

"Leonard," said Jim slowly, his voice getting a serious undertone in it. "You need to get off that seat, enter the shuttle, sit down, fasten the seatbelt and take the flight to the training facility on the East Coast to get the credits you need to pass in the final year."

"No," repeated Bones, clinging to the seat even tighter than before. Jim looked ready to tear him away from the seat and drag him into the shuttle, when the serious look in his eyes turned teasing.

_Come hither, come hither, come hither! Here shall he see no enemy but winter and rough weather, _he recited, beckoning Leonard to come closer - and as a cobra following the movements of a serpent charmer, Leonard found himself letting go of the seat and walking towards Jim.

Jim led him through the shuttle doors, his arm around his shoulder, keeping him from dashing away, while his voice whispered another stanza of the poem:

_All together here  
>And loves to live i' the sun,<br>Seeking the food he eats  
>And pleased with what he gets,<br>Come hither, come hither, come hither:  
>Here shall he see No enemy<br>But winter and rough weather._

The seatbelt was fastened quicker than the poem was finished. Bones held on the armrest in grip so tight that his knuckles turned white. _Flying._ He just hated it _so_ very much - they didn't even need to put him in a shuttle about to take off. Jim's breath caressed his ear when the shuttle moved towards the skies, the words washing over him in hushed tones, slowly making their way into his ear.

_O mistress mine, where are you roaming?  
>O, stay and hear; your true love's coming,<br>That can sing both high and low._

By merciful God, make it low, make. It. Low! He couldn't stomach his breakfast that morning - any thought of his rushed toward the flight, and that made his stomach make flip-flaps in his enterocoele - which was anatomicaly impossible, but tell it to his stomach. And even then, his _empty _stomach was lurching at the thought of shuttle flying above the to-the-God-honest Earth.

_Trip no further, pretty sweeting;  
>Journeys end in lovers meeting,<br>Every wise man's son doth know._

Jim was obviously getting kick of it, Leonard decided. Because who the hell would quote Shakespeare in moments when they could die of small hole in the shuttle's plating stealing their valuable air away? But goddamit, he chose his favourite play; _Twelfth Night_. Almost against his will he muttered:

"Excellent good, i' faith."

"Good, good..." Jim replied from the script before he continued.

_What is love? 'T is not hereafter;  
>Present mirth hath present laughter;<br>What's to come is still unsure.  
>In delay there lies no plenty,<br>Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty,  
>Youth's a stuff will not endure.<em>

Sweet and twenty... Sweet and twenty... Well, Jim definitely kissed him more then twenty times - but it was difficult to count kisses right now, his head spinning with air-sickness, palms wet with sweat. Gently, oh so gently Jim pried one of these palms from the armrest, taking it into his, caressing the abused fingers.

Leonard didn't really notice they landed on honest ground again - but he damn well remembered that he will have to take Jim to theatre to some honest-to-God Shakespearean play.

Just to be sure Jim didn't repeated himself the next time they have to take flight, that's it.


	10. Oh no, they didn't! T

**A/N:** So, there had been the OT post over at jim_and_bones community - so here is my part of the OT goodness, tehee! Well, as well as a bit of rant at famous authors and their words about fanfiction *glares* Also, Lurker!Bones strikes back, isn't it great? :D

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Oh no, they didn't!<br>**

Leonard had been sitting by his computer, for once doing nothing than catching up for the friendly updates on his LJ, when his eyes caught several interesting updates.

"Famous Authors on Fan Fiction"

"The Irregular OT post"

Sounds good, he thought, opening the first one. In less than five minutes he had been deviously deleting books from his ebook library, cursing like a man possessed.

"So stories using your characters make you barf, eh?" he hissed, punching the Enter key on his keyboard in answer to "Do you really want to delete folder "Outlander Series"? Proceeding to do so will delete all the files in it." Yes. Empty the Recycle Bin. Hell yes.

Leonard understood that some authors were against the idea of fan fiction using their characters. He got it that once you write something, it becomes your baby, and since it's your baby, you do not want to see it hurt (and man, some fan fic authors were really nasty to the characters!) and thus will do everything in your power to protect it. But saying that everything using your characters is only barf making?

"Well, my dear lady," he said, contentedly resting against the backrest of his chair, "I assure you that if nothing else, you accomplished that _I_won't be barfing at reading anything with your characters."

Browsing through his computer he noticed increased speed of every operation done by the machine. Hm, he thought, it seems that cleaning some space on your harddisc is like removing tumour...

Closing the panel with words about fan fiction, he returned to the _Irregular OT post_, opening it. He started a new comment:

"Hello everyone, I just read this interesting post about fan fiction - and after several simple operations my computer feels better than ever before... just like my bank account will feel in future, because I will buy no more of these works..." He was laughing not much later afterwards, some of the off-topic posts were just too funny - who would have thought that people would make icons starring Spock as a party animal? Haha!

Jim looked up from the book he was reading while being sprawled on the sofa. Hm, curious how pointing Bones in the right direction finally managed to make him do some much needed disc cleaning. Great. More space means more movies they can watch together.

And, of course, he made a note to himself, they will need new keyboard - but no need to tell Bones yet. If seeing him laughing so much meant destroyed keyboard, he will have to restock on keyboards in advance.


	11. The Melody You Play M

**A/N:** Written for May 10 Semi Weekly Man-on-Man post over at Jim-and-Bones LJ community. The community is friendlocked, but so worth of following! *swoons*

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>The Melody You Play<br>**

One of the first things Jim noticed about Leonard when he saw him being manhandled to the seat next to him, were his hands. Not that the rest of hi wasn't gorgeous in its own gruff way, too - but the hands, so vivid in their movement, caught his eye the most.

Maybe he should say that his eye almost caught his hand - agitated Bones could, can and will be public menace, with all the hand waving he always did.

During the years at Academy he noticed that no matter how filthy Bones got, his hands were always washed, nails precisely trimmed and clean.

Jim always thought that with hands like these Bones would be amazing musician, violinist or pianist; his fingers always sure and graceful in their movement. It would be easy to imagine Bones as a pianist from early 20th century, in a smoky bar, filling the air with quiet tones of jazz.

For some time Jim wondered what it would feel like to have these fingers on his skin; those strong, caloused fingers. All of Bones was perfect - but his fingers, those were the cherry on top. It took him very long time to dare to voice that question. And it also took quite a lot of alcohol - after all, there is nothing like liquid courage - and also liquid excuse for any idiotic behaviour.

It was also the first night of Bones playing whole symphonies to him, using his body as an instument to play, easily getting the piece to final crescendo, the melody ending in stepping on the sustain pedal, leaving the last notes reverberate until it faded away.

Bones knew how to play, what dynamics to use and when and how. It was worth to stay sober - if only to enjoy the music more.


	12. Moves Like Penguin K

**A/N:** Written for Daily Captain'n'Doctor post for June 16th over at Jim_and_Bones LJ group. Both boys looked really good in the tux...

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Moves Like Penguin<br>**

"I hate this tux," grumbled Bones, when he finally caught Jim on the gala they were forced to attend. "I feel like a big human penguin!"

"But you certainly look good as a penguin," teased Jim, his eyes sparkling with amusement at Bones' grumbling. Bones truly _did_clean up nicely, but with the scowling he did it probably was scaring half of the room from approaching them, which was just as fine. Finally a minute to talk, right?

"Just enjoy the gala, Bones, and when we are home, we'll work on de-penguinizing you," whispered Jim mischievously, lifting his hand to smooth the lines around Leonard's eyes.

Eyes, which now positively sparkled, as Leonard finally smiled back.


	13. Singing in the rain, T

**A/N:** Written for semi-weekly man on man for 14th May. Ehm, yeah, I tend to be really slow at posting these things over here O_o

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Singing in the rain<br>**

"Seriously, Bones, do you have to take so many things with you?" complained Jim, as he was waiting on Bones who was doing final preparations for the first free afternoon they had _in ages_. And he was taking _ages_ to be ready to leave their room.

"Shut up and let me think, kid," grumbled Bones, gazing on his bed thoughtfully. Well, not on his bed precisely; more likely at what he had laid on his bed. So, that's the first aid kit, some hypos in case Jim got allergic reaction to something, suntanning lotion, because the idiot will surely forget to take anything like that with him, his credit chip, umbrella, because it's April and you never know when the weather changes...

"Booooones," whined Jim, "let's go finally, or you'll spend the whole afternoon by packing."

Leonard just rolled his eyes and metodically started to get the things into his bag. Jim liked to call it _Bonesy's vanity bag_, much to his annoyance. It was man purse, dammit, very _manly_ purse, he might add.

"Alright," he nodded, "let's go."

"Fiiiiinally," smirked Jim, holding the door open for him with a gallant bow, making Leonard scowl at him as he walked out.

Part of him was thinking about probably being psychic or something - because all he took with him was needed. First, there had been some kid who managed to skin his knee rather badly in the part, as he fell from his bike, and Leonard's doctor side prevailed at the sight of crying boy.

Then Jim bought them both a cone of ice-cream, which had been absolutely delicious, if Jim wasn't allergic to some of its ingredients (Leonard made a mental note to himself to check the ice-cream later). Luckily, Bones' urse had the pack of hypos which were exactly what Jim needed when he was unable to breathe due to some idiotic allergic reaction.

It wouldn't be Jim, if he didn't manage to burn himself in the first warmer sunrays - only Bones' sun-tan lotion saved him from being burned to a crisp.

And of course, on their way back it started raining. While Jim got completely drenched in matter of few short moments, Bones just pulled the umbrella from his purse and hid under it, smirking at Jim as he did so. But to hsi surprise, Jim just started spinning under the rain, his face upwards as he laughed happily.

"I'm singin' in the rain, just singin' in the rain, what a glorious feeling, and I'm happy again. I'm laughing at clouds. So dark, up above, the sun's in my heart and I'm ready for love," he sang, looking at Bones and Bones felt blush creeping up his neck.

Trust it to Jim to get so theatrical.

Soon, Bones tossed the umbrella aside and danced with Jim under the rain, both of them singing as the storm continued to rage above their heads, dark clouds above their heads.

Later, much later Leonard got his purse and umbrella and Jim slung his arm around Leonard to keep him close, as he leaned his head on his shoulder.

The melody didn't leave even when Leonard was falling asleep, the words _'dancing in the rain, I'm happy again. I'm singin' and dancin' in the rain. Dancin' and singin' in the rain...'_ following him to his dreams.


	14. Save the Bike, Ride the Biker, M

**A/N:** Written for semi-weekly man on man for 17th May. NSFW, just so you know.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Save the Bike, Ride the Biker<br>**

The tattoo may have been damn idiotic idea, Leonard thought, but when he thought about it... it was damn worth the pain and discomfort he felt whenever something or someone brushed over the still sensitive skin. The lines of light blue ink were twirling around his chest, adding a little ornament here and there, accentuating the muscles he had (and he had some nice ones, he was proud to say).

Jim, of course, had to be "big boy" and decide for something bigger; more of a tribal tattoo, the dark ink creating ornaments on his shoulder in most enticing way, Leonard thought. And, of course, the kid had absolutely no shame, leaning over his bike like that, shirtless, showing off his new tattoo.

Even without the tattoo Jim would be sight to behold, but the way how he cared about the machine, touching it with gentle fingers, speaking to the machine as if it were a person or a horse.

Horse.

Leonard suddenly felt naughty. How did they say it back in 20th century? Save a horse, ride the cowboy? Well, that will be exactly what he is going to do, with just a little preparation - which took him such a short time, his body being ready for the ride so soon he almost brought himself off.

Sneaking behind Jim had been almost too easy; the younger man so absorbed in the task of cleaning his beloved bike that Bones had to run his arms around his body to get Jim realize _something_will be taking place between them very, very soon.

"Preparing for a ride, darlin'?" drawled Bones, lips pressed next to the tattoo, making Jim shiver with his touch, as well as the innuendo. And, of course, the drawl. Nothing better than to use these two weapons - innuendo spoken with the Southern drawl - on Jim.

"You could say so," answered Jim, rubbing his behind against Bones' groin.

"Well," drawled Bones, "you better take these jeans off then. I would bet my shoes you won't need them."

It never had to be said twice to Jim to take off his clothes. The jeans were lieing on the floor next to the bike in no time, Jim sprawling upon the bike as an antique statue would sprawl on his sleeping berth.

Bones was slower in undressing, allowing Jim to eye hungrily every centimetre of exposed skin. They had seen each other undressing or already undressed numerous times - yet the ink added such a feeling of novelty to it... It was almost like the very first time again.

"You better hold on tight," Bones said Jim's way. "Because this is going to be one hell of a ride." Jim nodded and sat astride on the bike, his eyes never leaving his lover as he walked over to join him on the bike.

"I'm going to save this bike," he declared theatrically, "by riding the biker." And before Jim could say anything, he was in his lap, facing him, slowly lowering himself onto Jim's already hard and waiting manhood.

Normally, Bones would be rather unnerved by the prospect of anyone walking on them but now he just let himself enjoy the sensations, touching Jim and letting Jim touch him back as he rode them both to the completion.

"You know, Bones," said Jim into the skin of his shoulder, God knows how much time later, "you left your socks on."

"You bet I did, kid," answered Bones, feeling like a cat who ate the canary. "I may be horny as hell - but there's no way I'm touching this floor with my bare feet. Do you have any idea how filthy it is...?"

The only answer he got was Jim's carefree laugh. Well, laugh all you want, kid, he thought, but this rider is going to get ridden, too!


	15. Sway With Me, T

**A/N:** Written for semi-weekly man on man for 21st May. SFW, just so you know, so prepare for some suggestive themes, tehee!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Sway With Me<br>**

There were ways Bones would like to spend his hard-earned shore leave and then there had been ways he would say "bloody hells, I'll pass" to. Trust it to Jim to talk him into agreeing with doing exactly that. How else to explain that he found himself in the biggest disco party on the whole planet of who-the-hell-cares-about-its-name?

He hated this kind of parties. He always did. The music was too loud, people were too touchy-feely, lights made his eyes bleed and his head hurt after a while, they never had anything decent to drink and merciful gods, the music they always played...! Of course, you can't expect classics being played at disco parties, but sometimes, the selection of songs played had been plainly awful and the DJs incapable idiots who thought they make good impressions on the girls, if they did the DJing.

Well, they definitely were making impression on him. NOT.

This party seemed to be rather different from the ones he had been used to. People actually minded their own business, absolutely uncaring about him and that was fine by him. The drinks they served here were of the crazy colours variety - but they were of good taste and good price, and once he had the radiant blue one, he found himself liking the music even more than he already did. It was smooth and it was making him feel relaxed, almost _fluid_in his movements.

He was unsure about how exactly he lost his shirt - but when the music switched from wild and almost frantic melody to slow one, he found himself embracing Jim from behind, sneaking his arms around the younger man, pressing himself against him. Swaying into the music seemed like a good way to do, and Jim didn't protest, when he led their movements into slow sway or rotated their hips.

He liked the freedom he had in touching Jim now, letting his hands slide under his tank top, enjoying the way the muscles moved under his touch, the way Jim threw his head back at the sensation, allowing him to explore the skin there.

Well, with Jim pressed against him, he thought that maybe he will start to like parties. Just _maybe_.


	16. Curling, M

**A/N:** Written for NSFW prompt for 24th May at **jim_and_bones**. NSFW, just so you know, so prepare for some suggestive themes, tehee!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Curling<strong>

Curling, said Bones, just one game of curling and I won't bother you about lack of exercises in your life.

Sports, my ass.

Well, it actually was about his ass, when he thought about that. In very literal sense. But as Bones moved above him, _inside_ of him, he could think only about how the word 'curling' just got completely different meaning than he would have anticipated. _There!_ How did Bones do that he always managed to hit just _that_place whenever his mind started to wander in strange places?

He curled himself around Bones, effectively trapping him inside. They were on shore leave, so there was no need to rush as they would, if they were on ship. Now they will take it slow, and play curling by Bones' rules all day long.

After all, Bones knows best how to exercise properly.


	17. Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, T

**A/N:** Written for picture prompt for 25 May at **jim_and_bones**.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Mirror, Mirror on the Wall<br>**

"You know, Jim, if you stopped looking at yourself in the mirror for so long, we could already be n our merry way and wouldn't have to be either hurrying unnecesarily or wouldn't be late," grumbled Leonard, leaning against the door to the dressing room.

Jim was looking at himself in the mirror, _again_, from all possible angles, checking if absolutely everything is where it should be.

"Sorry, Bones," he said, checking his shirt, "but you know I _have_ to look perfect, especially now?" he finished, suddenly looking nervous as a little boy who is trying to propose to his childhood crush.

_'So that had been the problem,'_ flashed through Leonard's head. He smiled, walking over to Jim, laying his hands on his shoulders. "You look perfect," he said, meeting Jim's eyes in the mirror. "So get your ass out of the house, or we're going to be more than fashionably late!" he added gruffily.

"The things you say," chuckled Jim, finally turning away from the mirror. "Time to face the music, then..."

"Dad, uncle Jim - you both look amazing! Janice and Katie are so going to get green from envy, as soon as they see you!" welcomed them a joyous female voice.

"Only the best for our Jo," agreed Leonard with a smile. He got the opportunity to dance with his girl on garden party organized by some of Jo's friends, and dressing up in this absolutely idiotic suit was worth the delight he could see in the face of his daughter.

He would also deny it to his dying breath - but white really looked good on Jim. _'Note to self,'_ he thought, _'sapphire on white gold.'_

Jim was fashionista. It wouldn't do, if he were to accept his proposal and wear a ring which would look bad on him. Period.


	18. Before they say I do, T

**A/N:** Written for 28th May SFW entry at **jim_and_bones**. Seriously, men in tuxedos look just _that_ good.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Before they say I do<br>**

"You know, Bones, you're as nervous as if it were _you_ walking down the aisle," said Jim teasingly, making Leonard look into the ground bashfully.

"Yeah," he replied, "I suppose it's not every day your head nurse asks you to walk her down the aisle, so she can marry ship chef-engineer."

"No kidding," smirked Jim. "Imagine _my_ surprise when Scotty came to my ready room, stuttering badly and sweating as if he was running a fever - only to stutter out that he wants to get married and I'm to wed them." H

e smiled suddenly, that secret little smile he saved for special occasions. "You look good in that tuxedo, Bones - and I'll be hard-pressed to look at the soon to be newly weds, as I'll be leading the wedding," he whispered, drawing Bones closer.

discreet cough startled them from the short private moment. "Captain, Doctor," Jim's yeoman, young and perky blonde woman of name Janice said, "I believe it's time to start."

"Just a moment." Jim turned back to Bones, leaning in to whisper in his ear. "As I said - you look good. But will definitely look even better, as I get you out of it tonight," he finished and was gone in blink, leaving Bones on the spot, his heart beating wildly.

Car with the bride arrived, and beaming Christine got out, smiling warmly. "So, Leonard," she said, as he led her to the building the wedding was taking place, "I'm glad you agreed to walk me down the aisle."

"It was an honour that you asked, Christine," answered Bones, feeling rather awkward.

She giggled, hiding her mouth delicately behind her hand. "And it was also piece of tactical thinking - nothing says 'and treat her well, dammit!' better than scowling doctor who is not afraid of using all those nasty hypos in the sickbay."

He only had time to chuckle at the notion, before they were by Jim and beaming groom, whose eyes were following Christine the whole time since they crossed the threshold. Christine let go of Leonard's arm and went to stand beside Scotty, giving him a gentle smile as she did so.

Leonard himself went to his place, allowing Jim' voice wash over his ears in the words "we have gathered here..."

The rest of the day was a bit like a dream; the last "I do's", throwing of the bouquet (part of him thought that Christine intentionally aimed at the men, instead of aiming at women, and given his luck, the damned bouquet hit him in the face, before he caught it in his hands), the feast, the dancing...

One thing was sure, though, as they re-affirmed themselves later that day, when they were finally alone. Both of them looked good in tuxedos. But outside of them, they looked much, _much_ better.


	19. This is WAR! T

**A/N:** This was written as another Lurker!Bones piece, this time for the notice of Word Wars on 7th July. Yeps. Lurker!Bones strikes when you least expect it :D

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>This is WAR!<br>**

Bones was sitting by his commputer, spending the last few hours by engaging in typing sprees, followed by long silences, where he would stare at the screen and chew on his lip.

"What are you doing, Bones?" asked Jim, during one of the silence periods, a bit worried about the other man. It was rather unusual for him to scowl like that, unless it had been something related to stupid self-inflicted injury, Jocelyn or fucked up away missions. Or shuttle rides.

"Be quiet, Jim," grumbled Bones, "I'm trying to take part in these word wars and every time I'm almost winning, someone else steals my thunder, dammit."

"Oh, really?" These word wars really caught Jim's interest. Bones only rarely participated in anything fandom related (well, apart from the de-lurking challenges, friendly posts or occasional comment). What were these wars about?

Soon, he found himself by his own computer terminal, in exact the same state as Bones - typing sprees followed by silence, during which he exchanged long looks with Bones, both their stares full of determination and silent promises.

There will be no backing down. Because this. Is. War.


	20. He's the guy who's the talk of the town

**A/N:** Written for first day, meaning September 10, of jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. Since I wrote more than one comment!fic on some days, I will try to post them the same way in this little colletion. I think you will see this more in your alerts now - sorry about cramming your mailbox space!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>He's the guy who's the talk of the town<strong>

This, thought Jim, would be a scene more fitting a western movie than a real life episode. Still, part of him imagined the camera work - first, it would be both of them looking at each other, then shot at Leonard's eyes, serious and slightly sheepish, then his eyes, sparkling blue and with touch of wonder in them...

That's when Leonard looks away from him, pretending to find something really interesting behind the window glass of the cops' car.

Funny.

It's usually him looking anywhere but at Leonard, Leonard scowling at him and grumbling about idiots who should know better. Now, they are sitting at the back of cops car, carried towards the nearest police station, Bones silent and unwilling to look at him, while he, Jim, can't stop thinking about western movies.

The car stops, and a cop opens the door, telling them to get our and follow him. They follow him to the station without any trouble, allowing themselves to be locked in the cell, waiting for someone to pay the fine they got for fighting.

Jim can't help but allow his mind return to the reason of their presence here. They were at the bar, minding their own business, when there was this idiot behind them, saying something he and his sycophants found very funny... He was prepared to ignore them, but Bones? Bones looked as if someone stabbed him with a needle as he heard the idiot's remarks and before anyone could be any wiser, he had been in the idiot's face.

Quite literaly, Jim could add.

Soon, the whole place had been either fighting or trying to stay out of reach of those who fought; Jim joining in only to beat some guys who thought it would be fun to gang on Bones, who had been fighting the original idiot. The bar owner was, unsurprisingly, rather unhappy about what was happening in his bar, calling cops after them pretty quickly.

Bones still refused to look at him, so Jim decided to find something to do to pass the time before someone, most probably Spock, will get them out. He started to whistle quietly, noticing how Bones' ears perked at the melody he whistled. All The Way Trinity.

"He's the guy who's the talk of the town, always takes his time..." hummed Jim, watching from the corner of his eye how Bones little by little turned his gaze at him, as the song progressed, even joining in whistling the melody.

"I didn't know you liked spaghetti western movies, kid," grumbled Bones when the song ended.

"I didn't know you actually started fights, Bones," retorted Jim. "Really, Bones, usually it's _me_ getting in trouble and _you_chewing me for that."

Bones was quiet for a moment before he suggested off-handedly: "Well, everything is for the first time, once."

"That's true," asnwered Jim quietly. "This was the first time someone stood up to me."

Before Bones can say anything, there's the police officer at the door, placing a key in the lock. "Well, gentlemen, looks like your cavalry is here to get you out. Try to stay out of trouble next time."

"Will do, officer," grumbled Bones.

The officer gave Jim a smile as Bones exited the cell first. A soft whistle, carrying the tune of All Way To Trinity, followed them outside, bringing smirks to both their faces.

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><p><strong>AN:** I blame Terence Hill and Bud Spencer for this. All Way To Trinity melody owns my soul.


	21. Goaaaaaaal!, T

**A/N:** Written for first day, meaning September 10, of jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. For SFW entry. Since I wrote more than one comment!fic on some days, I will try to post them the same way in this little colletion. I think you will see this more in your alerts now - sorry about cramming your mailbox space!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong><strong>"Goaaaaaaal!"<strong>**

It would be easy to say that Captain James T. Kirk did not have the best relationship with dares. Yep. Dares.

Jim hated dares, because whenever someone dared him to something, he usually felt the need to prove people that he _can_ do something and he will _do_ the something.

This time, the colony governor dared the Enterprise crew to play football with the colonists and boom! - suddenly, there had been so many volunteers they had to pick straws who will be playing. Jim, of course, had been the team Captain, and so far, the Enterprise had been losing rather badly against the colonists.

And the damn backwater colony doctor had the guts to mock him, Leonard, about that.

"Dammit, Jim, if you'll kick their asses, I'm going to kiss you right in front of all of these people," he exploded after one extra mocking right before the pause in the game.

Jim just looked at him strangely as he was pulling off his T-shirt, making Bones wince. 'Open mouth, insert foot, you southern idiot.' It wasn't that he wouldn't innniate kisses at all. He would. When they were _alone_. But every time _Jim_ tried to innitiate kiss when they weren't completely alone, he tended to be rather unwiling in any kind of PDA and rather vocal about that, too.

"Deal," he said, leaving Bones standing on his spot, while running to the rest of his team.

It was like a spell was cast over the whole team. They would pass the ball in such spectacular manoeuvres that the rival team would be running all over the field without getting even close to the ball.

Spock, who had been doing the commentary together with one of the colonists, sounded rather smug at the newest developement, if Leonard was any judge of that.

At least, the whistle ended the game, with Enterprise team as victor and Bones felt strangely unnerved at the prospect of kissing Jim with so many witnesses.

And then Jim was standing in front of him, wearing that unsure smile of his and he just couldn't care less about the people around. He just grabbed him, pressing him against himself, as he kissed the man as if his life depended on it.

If there were any cat calls or whistles, he decided to ignore them and reward the man who once again showed that dares are there for the daring people to pass them.


	22. Smart Clothes, K

**A/N:** Written for secondday, meaning September 11, of jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong><strong>Smart Clothes<br>****

If there was one thing Leonard hated about being on Earth, it was this neccessity of being seen by public.

Damn it all. Why he has to wear a suit when the public wants to see him?

"Because smart people need to wear smart clothes," sounded Jim's voice from behind him, startling him from his daydream. Yeah, trust it to be him to speak his thoughts aloud and Jim picking up on that.

"Idiot," he grumbled.

Jim chuckled. "Yeah, and the idiots get to wear not-so-smart cothes!" he said, sticking his tongue at Bones.

For the rest of the day, Leonrad was running from one interview to another, while Jim enjoyed himself at walking through the city, wearing his jeans, dark shirt and sunglasses.

Some people, Bones decided, are just _that_ lucky.


	23. Always Like The First Time, K

**A/N:** Written for September 12, third day of jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. I wrote two entries, so you will get two chapters pretty quickly following each other (probably just a day apart, because hey, anticipation must floooow).

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong><strong>Always Like The First Time<br>****

It didn't matter how long Jim was Captain of the Enterprise - every time he put on his shirt in colour of command gold, every time he entered the bridge, every time he nearly jumped into the captain chair and spun around like a child on carousel... his face lit like a candle on Christmas tree.

It would be so very easy to damped that excitement of being the captain, of wearing command gold, or spinning in his chair. All it would take would be one reprimand, one careless remark, one grimace... No one ever did that, all of them secretly chuckling at Jim's shenanigans aka "oooh, look, I'm the Captain for the very first time!"

Most of them Bones. He already knew what Jim is or is not capable of - and even if sometimes it got on his nerves, this childish enthusiasm, without it Jim wouldn't be Jim.

And so Bones suffered in silence... and chuckles.


	24. Behind Every Successful Man, T

**A/N:** Written for September 12, third day of jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge, the second comment fic I wrote for that entry. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong><strong><strong>Behind Every Successful Man<strong>****

Whenever Jim successfuly done something, Bones was there, standing on the sidelines and giving Jim _The Look_, usually laced with genuine affection, delight and humour.

On the other hand, Bones was there, wearing exactly the same look whenever Jim done something incredibly stupid, too - but at those times, the look had been laced with various emotions, depending on what the hell did Jim do this time. Usually it was worry, because the younger man had a thing for getting himself in worrisome situations.

After Jim got the captaincy of the Enterprise, it soon became a running joke among the crew. Captain would do something stupid - there would be a hell to pay, as promised Doctor's look, once he would get from 'way too close to death' back to 'way too alive'. He would do something smart, there would be a lot to be paid, once again promised by the long look the Doctor gave to Kirk.

Oh yes. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. Or, as would be in this instance - behind every great captain is his doctor, giving him _the look_.


	25. Mr Undercover

**A/N:** Written for September 13, during jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Mr Undercover<strong>

These undercover missions had been damn pain in neck, decided Leonard. While he would survive the running around wearing the suit and the damned tie, the shooting everything that moved was a bit against his _'dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not some damned sharpshooter!'_

But, as it usually goes, the higher ups couldn't care less about what he had to say about his orders it seemed, and so he found himself working as a spy.

Jim, on the other hand, seemed to be rather enjoying the whole situation. "It will be just like in an action movie, Bones!"

Right. Action movie. Especially when Bones knew the kid just wanted to do the pew pew for real.


	26. Unbearable Lightness of Being, T

**A/N:** Written for September 14 semi-weekly man-on-man NSFW entry, during jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Unbearable Lightness of Being<strong>

If there was one thing Jim absolutely loved about swimming, it was the lightness he felt when he was in water; suddenly, all problems seemed not to be such problems anymore, leaving him to float on the water's surface.

Being underwater was even better - everything limited itself on the absolute silence, only his heartbeat breaking it with its steady rythm. The water - it was like outer space; even the first space conquerors knew that and practiced for crisis situations in big pools. Which also may have been one of the reasons why Bones hated being underwater so much - it reminded him of the space he so despised too much for his liking and comfort.

But time to time, he would join Jim in the water, sliding quietly through the water mass until he was next to him, reaching for him and bringing their bodies close. And during these times, two heartbeats became one.


	27. You Got Call, T

**A/N:** Written for September 14 daily post, during jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>You Got Call<br>**

Jim was biting his nails.

Well, Jim was so nervous that he was seriously considering biting his nails up to his elbows, but that was something Bones would never allowed to happen - but at the same time, the idea sure seemed more fun than the damned waiting.

Bones was at the other side of the table, just as nervous as Jim had been - well, just without biting his nails. It would look bad to bitch at Jim for biting his nails, just to turn around and do it himself, he mused, hypnotizing the phone which laid on the desk between the two of them.

The clock on the wall was slowly - well, slowly to them - measuring the time, the lock hand slowly moving around. Tic. Toc. Tic. Toc. Tic. And toc.

Tink!

The display of the phone suddenly lightened up, the custom melody, set up by Jim, playing in the silence. With shaking hand, Bones took the phone and pressed the "Accept" button.

"Hello," he said into the phone, his voice quiet and shaky. Jim was watching him intently, his ears straining to hear the caller's voice.

"Daddy!" sounded joyful voice from the phone, making both of them breathe out in relief.

All was fine on the Earth, even if they got back one day late.


	28. Paling Pictures, T

**A/N:** Written for September 15 daily post, during jim_and_bones comment!fic challenge. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but this silly piece of writing.

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><p><strong>Paling Pictures<br>**

It came as a surprise to everyone on the Enterprise when the photoseries came up in some cheesy tabloids.

**James Tiberius Kirk - A Photo Model! Read More At Page 58 - 62!** announced the headlines on the front page. And of course, half of the Enterprise crew just had to purchase a copy of that.

The pictures ranged from portaits of the man who was their Captain now to body part studies; various poses, expressions, make-up, costumes...

One set of pictures is portaying Jim as a masqueraded gentleman from 18th century - only his blue eyes giving away it's him.

Another set shows Jim as a hippie; the peace signs present on every single piece of his clothing, his hair long, his face unshaved - but there is a big smile playing on his lips, adding a cheerful feel to that one.

Pictures of Jim in various uniforms follow - there is Jim in uniform of Soviet Officer, Jim in ANZAC uniform, Jim in British uniform... Uniforms really fitted Jim as a glove, sighed dreamily half of the crew.

Then there is one which is deeply disturbing - Jim is looking as if he hadn't eaten for weeks, if not months; he's dirty, dressed in something several crewmembers identified as the clothing which had been worn by prisoners in German concentration camps during second world war. It made Bones uneasy, the void in Jim's eyes, the hollowness of his cheeks, especially since he looked younger in those shots. Younger than anyone should be, when taking pictures like these.

And then there is one last picture, obviously the last one Jim ever sat as a model to - it doesn't even really look like him. His hair are dyed to darker colour, he's once again unshaved, although this time it seems more like a coincidence instead of intention. It's probably the least prepared shot, but to Leonard it's also one of the most valuable - Jim's emotions naked in the set of his eyes, in the way his hands are clasped together in his lap, as if he was about to pray and the photographer had interrupted him.

The whole article is finished with "all those pictures had been auctioned and the profits donated to organization helping to families of those Starfleet members who died on duty." And suddenly, the last picture made sense. You never know when the bells is going to toll for those you love - all you can do is to sit, and pray for their safe return.


End file.
